Thursday, February 26, 2009

my facebook profile is not Jdate or I'm being stalked by a girl

As I'm pretty sure I've mentioned before, the Russian Jewish community is really small. (Cue Disney music.) You only ever need to know two people. Those two people will know two more people, then they will know two people, and so in any social situation where you are a complete stranger, you will be surrounded by people you've never met but have heard all about you and you will be able to fake your way through anything.

The area I live in is in the heart of a massive Russian Jewish community and there is a big Jewish center accross the street from my house. I don't really fit in in the Russian community (I have lived in America for over 18 years and am really Americanized), but when I first moved, I went there a few times just so I could meet people and make friends. Needless to say, I did not fit in, and a lot of people made that very obvious to me and made it clear that I was not welcome, so I stopped going there pretty quickly. A couple of people from there were nice to me and friended me on facebook. More of their friends that I've never met started friending me from the "people you may" know feature, and I am now friends with the congregation of an entire synagogue including the rabbi, after having met only about 4 people there.

I am one of those people that when I get involved in something, I get really involved and hands-on. My facebook profile attests to this because it says how I'm a chapter advisor, have another volunteer role within my sorority, and am also the president of the NYC alumnae chapter. This one girl who friended me, J, saw this and clearly this made me attractive to her because she is very involved in Hillel, a nation-wide Jewish organization that is on just about every single college campus in America. I say just about because there is a Hillel chapter for Brigham Young, but not for the college that I attended. This girl J is very active in Hillel and several other organizations geared specifically towards Russian Jews and is always looking to expand them. Being that I have had my share of frustrations with volunteering, I completely sympathize with her on how hard it is to get an organization off the ground and how frustrating it is when people don't care or don't show up to events of an organization that you put your heart and soul into. J started inviting me to a lot of Hillel events, but to be perfectly frank, I have zero desire to hang out with 18 year olds named Boris who drive souped up Altimas with illegally tinted windows, or to belong to a college organization that I did not participate in during college, at a school that I never even attended in the first place. Every time she invited me to events I would always rsvp no. Then she started inviting me to executive board meetings of these organizations and asked me to be involved with the eboard. I sent her a polite message saying that I would love to help out but don't have the amount of time that is necessary to devote to being an executive board member of an organization. I told her if she needed any behind-the-scenes stuff and I was free, I would help her out because I'm a pro at stuff like that. She never responded to my message but continued inviting me to executive board members-only events. It got to the point that as soon as I saw "J invited you to the event" I would automatically delete it or rsvp no without reading it.

A couple of days ago, I got a friend request from a boy that I've never heard of or met. His message was "Hey MRM =)." Being that we had a bunch of friends in common, I was like ok, I'll accept the request. It's no secret that I love to cook and bake, so I generally like to have someone over for dinner at least once a week so I have an excuse to cook for someone. I usually put up status messages asking if anyone wants to come to dinner. Well boy I've never met apparently does. Because J told him that I'm a great girl and we'd make a terrific couple so he should ask me out. Boy I've never met is several years younger than me and is still in college. J and I have never met. Why is she setting me up with guys? Seriously folks, wtf?


  1. Ummm creep alert! It took me a few reads to get all of the details right but wow that girl seems really odd. And who invites themselves on a date with someone they don't know via FB?! Wow.

  2. that's just... awkward. I think this woman has some major issues with boundaries.

  3. How unfortunate. Both people sound ... special.

  4. eww! sounds like it's time to play around with facebook privacy settings...

  5. wow, she seems really interested in you! I'm surprised she hasn't gotten the message yet that you don't want to be involved. But does this guy seem like a nice guy?

  6. She is sounding more than a little creepy!